Business in the front, party in the back.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

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The ladybugs have always had different personalities, even in the womb, so it isn't a surprise that we find ourselves noting the ways that they react to certain situations and even to each other.

From C&L 12-24 months

Charlotte has always been slightly more dominant, which we attribute to the fact that she has always weighed just a little bit more than her sister. A pound isn't enough to set them apart visually (although it can be when you spend an hour with one in your arms and then switch to her sister) but it has meant that Charlotte can hit physical milestones a tiny bit earlier and assert herself a little more, too.

As a result, Charlotte stood unassisted first and took her first solo steps first and is now walking about 10 steps at a time before she stumbles and falls. She was practicing standing up for a few weeks, sticking her butt up in the air with hands and feet on the ground, and when she stands up she has to move her hips forward or back to compensate for the new center of gravity. But once she had it she immediately used that to step forward, wobbling around stiff-legged, swinging her hips from side to side instead of bending her knees, until she had her center of gravity so far off that she'd fall.

I'd get a song stuck in my head: "What do you do with a drunken sailor, what do you do with a drunken sailor, what do you do with a drunken sailor, early in the morning?" Which is very catchy and sticks with you for a long time. And is easy to plant in someone else's head as well. (Hi, Teri!)

The other advantage that Charlotte has is that she highly values praise. So, when we clap and tell her that she did a good job, she smiles from ear to ear, looks to us for more and then tries to do it again. Lilah, on the other hand, likes to do things for her own benefit. We can talk to her about doing something but she has to want to do it for herself before she'll try it. But when Lilah does want to do something, she will be incredibly determined and work hard to figure it out all on her own until she's mastered it.

Sometimes Lilah will use Charlotte's successes to her advantage - even though she doesn't learn a task as early, she pays attention to what her sister is doing and when she does give it a try she learns it much more quickly. Or she will work so hard at something that she'll accomplish it while Charlotte is giving up, like getting up on the couch. Lilah figured out that she could use the corner of our sectional couch to push off from one side to another with her feet, and she put one foot in between the body of the couch and the cushion to gain more traction. Suddenly, BOOM! She's right there next to you, silent as a cat. Charlotte still tries to get up on a straight side and attempts to lift one leg above her shoulder to get it on to the top of the couch, but this doesn't give her any traction at all, although bonus points for flexibility!

Lilah is also determined to do things for herself as much as she can. If you hand her sister a piece of food, she'll allow you to put it in her mouth. But, on the off chance Lilah lets you put food directly in her mouth, she will pull it out and put it back in again herself instead.

But when it comes to their interactions with each other, Charlotte can be a bit of a bully, even if she isn't meaning to. She's so capable of taking something from Lilah that frequently she'll reach for something and Lilah will just back away because she figures that she would have to give it up anyway. Sometimes Lilah will move along as though nothing ever happened and find something new and cool for her sister to take over. If it is something she was very highly interested in, she will scream and cry but still let it happen. We're often torn about whether we should step in and take the object back from Charlotte or whether it's all part of them figuring out the world and each other.

They do manage to be very well-adjusted with other kids because of these experiences - they don't get irritated when someone is rough-and-tumble with them and for the most part they're content with sharing toys and especially the grown-ups in the room. We've spent time with other kids who are still solo in their households and they definitely aren't as tolerant in these ways, so it's a benefit for them. And since the ladybugs are constantly paying attention to what the other girl is doing, they are equally fascinated by older kids and all the cool things they're doing, too.
From C&L 12-24 months

A few other ways the girls have distinguished themselves lately: Lilah is quite a bit more talkative and she's started using her pointer fingers to indicate everything. She points at things she's curious about, things she wants, things she likes a lot, things that she wants to draw our attention to, etc. She's also displaying some of mommy's obsessive-compulsive tendencies with stacking toys neatly, putting them one-by-one into a container and then taking them out one-by-one, and always keeping pairs of things together (like shoes). Charlotte is practically fearless, whether she's climbing on their playstructure or the couch, and scares us with how she throws herself around without regard for the risks. She also has the most fun with copying our facial expressions and gestures and has a belly laugh that echoes through the whole house, even though she fakes it sometimes to indicate that she knows something is supposed to be funny. Lilah, on the other hand, doesn't laugh nearly as easily - she makes us work for it!

Now that they have pre-molars, the chomper teeth, they are getting much better at chewing food and we can give them strips of food (like peeled apples, sandwiches, meat, bread, etc.) instead of chopping it into bits, so they're able to explore some very new foods, which has been very fun (and easier) for us all. Both girls have started being fascinated with putting on shoes and socks and try very hard to do it themselves, albeit unsuccessfully. They also recognize other behaviors we do frequently and try to copy those themselves, like taking off their clothes or spreading lotion on their chests, making phone calls with Bristle Blocks or brushing their hair. We can really see them taking in the world around them and learning from it, applying it, using the information, and growing up!